She travels

We had the chance to interview Pauline, the creator of the travel blog Graine de voyageuse. Pauline is from Normandy, speaks four languages, left everything to travel in Southern Asia a few years ago and recounts her adventures on her blog ever since. Here are her thoughts on solo female travels.

Can you tell me a bit about yourself, when did you start travelling alone? Why? What is your current situation?

I started to travel when I was 19: I went to England for two months as an au pair to improve my English, and I took this opportunity to travel around a bit. Then, for my language studies I went abroad for internships, which allowed me to improve my language skills and to discover what it was like to travel solo (but once more, it was supervised). Then, when I started to work, I wanted to go to Costa Rica with some friends, but I ended up going there alone as no one was ready to travel into the unknown at this time. After this experience, I became completely addicted to travelling.

Today I’m 31 and I have multiple faces: I’m a freelance redactor and translator, but also a blogger, and sometimes a photograph, depending my clients’ needs. My blog is not a professional one, it is only a hobby.

Among the countries you have visited, which one is your favourite?

It is a very hard question, as I loved every travel for different reasons! I am thinking about Costa Rica because it was my first solo travel. I can still remember the adrenaline sensations when I was sitting in the plane, I didn’t know what I would do or see! Also Mexico, where I almost settled, because the people are adorable, it is a very festive atmosphere, so you want to party and to smile all the time, there is music in every street…It is a happy country, with a lot of joie de vivre!

Which country or travel experience really surprised you?

Iran! It was a real slap in the face. I was accompanying a friend visiting his expatriate brother. I didn’t really think about it, I took my plane tickets and it is only after that I thought to myself “Wait, what am I getting into? We are talking about Iran”! There are so many negative associations, with what we hear in the media…In the end I was super surprised, even before we landed. During the flight, some local women went to ask me a lot of questions, fascinated that I was going there, thanking me for taking an interest in the country which had such a bad reputation. At the time, tourism was not very developed yet. So I felt very much welcomed, and this feeling stayed with me during my stay. People were adorable, we were offered pistachios and sweets in the streets, people were welcoming us…  

What does travelling alone bring you?

The freedom! I choose what I want to do, when and with who I want to do it. It is a freedom without frustration, with concessions. I organise and plan according to me and what I want. Also, when you travel alone, you attract people, it leads to more encounters than when you are accompanied. I’ve seen this huge difference when I travel with my husband or solo.

When solo, I am never alone, I meet people every day, I have found myself more sociable than I am in my normal daily life. You really become a magnet for people! But when I am travelling with someone, it is much more limited, there is a sort of barrier that makes people hesitate to come up to you, since you are accompanied.  

Has travelling changed your perception of yourself? How?

I realised that I am stronger than I thought. When I travel solo, I realise that I can take decisions that could change the trip entirely (going to this person instead of this one, this place rather than another…). I managed to assert myself more, to say no. So, you become stronger and more autonomous, since you learn how to live and organise yourself, especially when you move around a lot, so you have to learn how to adapt.

Do you have an experience or person you met who changed your way of perceiving yourself, or the others, or even the fact of travelling alone?

Yvanna, a French woman I met during a volunteer mission in Laos in a national park. I was making videos to present their tours, and she was doing stunning interviews of the employees and the population. She told me she worked intensely for six months to save up money and that she travelled for the rest of the year, spending as little as possible, by volunteering. She allowed me to see that one doesn’t have to live in the frame the society is trying to set us in (work work work, commute every day, must have a house and a stable job…) and that one can choose to have a complete different life and live from it. It really inspired me.

What would you say to people who say that traveling alone as a woman is dangerous?

To travel alone is not that dangerous. When one leaves in solo, one develops one’s instinct, one’s intuition, a lot: one takes safe decisions a lot more than bad ones, since one is a lot more careful and aware of one’s environment.  When one is alone, one listens to oneself and one’s sensations a lot more rather than accompanied, where one can rely on the others. One asks for people’s help, like the places and neighbourhoods to avoid. I don’t think that leaving alone abroad is more dangerous, I got way more troubled in the streets of France than abroad.

There is no touristic country more dangerous than another, for example I never had any issues in Mexico, where everyone was telling me not to go, while I got my worst travelling experience in Thailand, a place supposed to be super safe for tourists. In consequences, I don’t really listen what people tell me about this or this country anymore.

How could we change this idea that women shouldn't travel alone, and should go with someone?

I think this mindset is already changing. We see women travelling solo a lot more, and they are more and more visible. When I started my blog, there were already solo blogs existing, and when I left for the first time, I obviously read everything I could on these blogs to reassure myself. Just the fact to talk about it and to show that it is possible and doable, by normal people like you and me, I think it already helps a lot.

What is your worst experience? How did you handle it? Did it have an impact on you, your behaviour or your life?

In Thailand, where I got all my belongings stolen on an island, when my bag was right behind me. I was left with nothing: no passport, no credit card, no money or phone, no camera, no hostel room card…every essential when you travel, gone. Thankfully, I had befriended two boys on the boat taking me to the island, who really helped me. Thanks to them I was able to call my mom so she could block all my cards remotely and send me money, the two boys gave me food, the hostel manager used my deposit to pay me another night there… To get an emergency travel pass to go back home turned out complicated, the local police was lazy, or corrupted, and were not taking my complaint seriously, but I really needed to file one for my passport theft report. And impossible to get an appointment with the embassy, which can only be obtained by calling them, because the police wouldn’t let me use their phone…Finally, I went directly on site, a fourteen-hour bus trip away, and managed to sneak in between two appointments. I could not feel welcome nor safe anymore. The only benefit was the camera theft because it forced me to enjoy my surroundings and the landscapes without worrying about my belongings, since I had nothing left anymore.  

What advice and tips would you give women who hesitate to travel alone?

First of all, to book in hostels or couchsurfing platforms, this is where one meets people the most. Hotels are a lot less conducive to encounters. When I travel solo, personally, it is too meet a maximum of people, to talk with people, to enrich myself from their experiences. Second, to download an offline map, like with the app Maps.me. There are countries where wandering can be nice, but in others, it is best to avoid it, like in Brazil, where slums can be found right next to residential neighbourhoods. Also, to keep relatives updated, especially if one leaves for a hike on one’s own: let them know where one is going, how, in how much time one should be back, and a local number, like the hostel’s. In case of a problem, if one sprains an ankle, it is always good to know locals that could help. Most importantly, ask advice to locals, they know the place, sometimes even better than guides. It can lead to incredible encounters and experiences, like this local who took me to a national park at night to see nocturnal crabs, or this one who took me to a hot spring in a river, away from the tourists!

Your best experience while travelling?

In Indonesia, to Mount Bromo, a volcano on the Java island. I really wanted to avoid the overpriced tours crowded by tourists to get there, so, by asking around to locals, friends, and bloggers, I was advised to go there on scooter. I left with my husband, who now travels with me, before everyone so that we got the perfect spot to see the sunrise, away from the mass of tourists, it was magical. We stayed there three days, when most people only stay for the day. And to watch the sunset, we went on top of the volcano. Arrived there, the view was magnificent. We found ourselves alone on the volcano, able to walk around, with the smoke and the volcano rumbling, it was an extraordinary experience. I also got lucky enough to observe a brown bear in a national park in Italy during an internship, thanks to naturalists who were writing their thesis and who took me with them. I got all teary!

Do you have a message to women who will read/watch you?

If you have the slightest wish, but really, the slightest, go for it! Worst case scenario, it’s a bad experience, a good joke to tell your friends or children in a few years, best case scenario, it becomes a passion, you become completely addicted, because it is so enriching! At least, try, make an attempt, even if it looks uncomfortable at the beginning, even if it is not far away from home (and there is no need for a trip to be far away!), maybe a passion will be born from it!

We recently had the honour to interview Tiphanya, the author of the blog Avenue Reine Mathilde. Tiphanya is a mom-traveller, is passionate about Marie Curie, and often travels with her eight-year-old daughter. We got her insights on solo female travelling and travelling as a mom.

Can you tell me a bit about yourself, when did you start travelling alone? Why? What is your current situation?

I started to travel after my high school hosted Australian students for a year. I thought that if they were capable of living abroad for a year, I could do the same for six weeks. One of them had lived with my family and I, so, after I graduated from high school, I went to Australia to visit her, and then went to Tasmania to visit another. Today I still travel, either alone, with my family or in duo with my eight-year-old daughter.

Among the countries you have visited, which one is your favourite?  

Australia, because of its impact, this is where I realised that I didn't want to pursue the education I had destined myself for, and where I dared to say to my parents that I wanted to stop. It led to a lot of changes. Also, Togo, where I went seven years later as a volunteer -I was a French as second language teacher.

Which country or travel experience really surprised you?

Alsace, even if this is in France, it made me realise the massive cultural differences within a country! I thought things would be the same as where I come from, but it is all the differences with my region of origin that really marked me: shops being closed on Sundays, or even closing as early as on Saturdays at 3pm, the bread names in bakeries, the vocabulary, the fact that a lot of people spoke Alsatian… We even received rude comments on my husband’s Parisian accent! As I wasn’t expecting it, the shock was even greater.

What does travelling alone bring you?

A real gain of confidence, I realise I am capable of doing things when I don’t have any choice anymore. It is easy in our daily life to postpone things to later, or to rely on others, especially when travelling with people, because you can hide behind them and let them take the lead. But in doing so, you don’t put yourself in danger! When you are alone, face to face with yourself, if you really want to do something you have to go past the fear you can have. Every time I come back home, I realise how much I am capable to do things by myself. It is a real confidence boost.

Has travelling changed your perception of yourself? How?

Yes and no. This idea of self-confidence I feel like I need to travel to maintain it. If I leave too much time between two trips, sometimes I find myself saying that I don’t travel that much. I kind of forget. It is the confinement in the daily life that does that, the everyday organisation and structure that anaesthetize me a bit.

To travel is like a reminder shot, a wake-up call that one is completely in control of one’s daily life. I empower myself.

Do you have an experience or person you met who changed your way of perceiving yourself, or the others, or even the fact of travelling alone?

When I returned from internship in Canada, I had a big realization. I had arrived at the Paris airport, and, wanting to get out, found myself surrounded by passengers from an African flight -so the majority of them were black. I was queueing with them, but one security agent came up to me and told me I could get out of the queue and get out immediately. I was barely 20, and was impressionable, so I didn’t dare to say anything and passed everyone in line to get out. Until that point, I had always thought that to travel as a woman was easier, because some checkpoints are faster for us, people are less suspicious, our bags are not searched etc. But for the first time, I realised that more complex issues are at stake, such as racism, that one doesn’t perceive if one is a white female. This is when I realised that, because I am a white French woman, I probably have more privileges than others, with all the implications this has. It put me to my place, reminded me of what I am and of what I could never pretend I am not. Especially now, because I am a white woman, AND I have a child with me when I travel.

What would you say to people who say that traveling alone as a woman is dangerous?

I have a very negative view of things: the reason for which we think that travelling alone as a woman is dangerous, is what makes being a woman something dangerous in our society. The danger is the same when you go out clubbing in Paris or when you are walking alone on the other side of the globe. Being a woman is an issue. We are in no more danger elsewhere because we are in danger everywhere!  Just look at the reality of violence against women, anywhere could be worse, but it also could be better.

How could we change this idea that women shouldn't travel alone, and should go with someone?

I find that the people who have this idea are mostly women, not men. I think it's really a groundwork that women have to do on themselves, on these beliefs holding them back. You must dare to do it, even if it means leaving with girlfriends, since the danger is there anyway because you are a woman, not because you are alone. So why not start travelling together, and then gradually start traveling alone? Men, at least in my circle, have never remarked to me about the fact that I travel alone, whereas the women do. Internalized messages maybe?

What is your worst experience? How did you handle it? Did it have an impact on you, your behaviour or your life?

I never had anything really serious. The only thing coming back is this ankle I sprained while in Togo. I had had feedback on the local hospitals in the country, and on the overall health system, and I really didn’t want to get to know the treatment conditions. One of the Togolese observed my ankle, which was swelled, and proceeded to massage it, with only moisturising cream. And the swelling disappeared! Then the entire village took care of me, everyone was helping me, the community spirit was incredible. However, I didn’t expect their reactions to my healing: having a very white skin, my ankle turned purple, blue and yellow, as it does when there is a bruise, and they thought it was gangrening! With their black skin, they had never seen a bruise heal that way! Some times later an osteopath told me I had been really lucky to get this kind of treatment, because there was no sign anywhere that something had happened!

What advice and tips would you give women who hesitate to travel alone?

To not hesitate to do it in a secure frame. When I left as a volunteer, it was in this secure frame. It allows us to have trained interlocutors, professionals in case of. Same thing for my trip to Australia, I had contacts there. Before departing for Cambodia for example I had talked to a Belgium woman expatriated there and had her number. Even the embassy number is enough, it allows us to hold on to something, to know that there are people that could help us -unlike the family who stayed at home and can’t do anything remotely.

Your best experience while travelling?

I love to eat! Eating in Japan is amazing. I have this specific memory of being invited at a very good restaurant, and of marvelling at the refinement of the dishes and their beauty. I always thought the aesthetic side was exaggerated in movies or books, but it actually is not.

What has becoming a mother and travelling with a child change for you?

In reality, travelling with my daughter hasn’t changed anything, since I “slow travel” anyway. With a child, one has a lot more interactions with locals, one meets more people. They come more to one, they soften up, and the child, who has a lot less inhibitions, goes easily to them, so one just has to follow! In Sicily, my daughter had no problem whatsoever coming up to people and talking to them. People are always ready to help and are even sometimes disappointed to no get any more time with the child! For example, in Croatia, the waitress really wanted to babysit and hold my daughter while I was going to the bathroom. Of course, it all disappears when your child grows up…

How did your first trip with your daughter go?

I spent a week in Sicily with my daughter- who was then two years old. Generally speaking, I think travelling alone goes well, the hardest thing is not to be a solo mom, it is to be a mom period. The difficulties are the same wherever one goes: is my child hungry? thirsty? sleepy? The change of frame is nice, because it allows to change up from the daily life, to be more relaxed.

To you, what are the pros and cons of travelling for a kid?

Of course, travelling can be disturbing to them because they have less landmarks. But landmarks are not necessarily four-bedroom walls and a bed, you can create them! We travelled continuously for a year and a half, the landmark I had created for her was the little felt horses I had bought in Kyrgyzstan and that I hung above her bed. So whenever we were, in the fifth or fifteenth accommodation, her bed was where the little horses were. Landmarks are especially the parents. Travelling, for children, is also all the hugs, all the time we spend with them, the books we read them, it is also this who feeds their souls. I think it is an investment for the future, travelling allows them to discover new things, new tastes, or new languages. It helps build them as people. Travel shapes youth!

What advice would you give to a mother who hesitates to travel solo with her kid?

When we are together, my daughter and I, we are a team, so we plan everything together. One must explain to the child what is going on, what is going to happen. It avoids surprises and bad reactions. When it is only us two, I need her to listen to me, for example for safety reasons, so I need to listen to her as well. For example, when she was younger, she had to hold my trousers’ pocket while I took pictures. Find some tricks like this. And honestly, if solo moms are able to do this in their daily life, they are more than capable to do the same when travelling!

Do you have a message to women who will read you?

You don’t need to go far to have a real trip. It’s not because you haven’t been sitting for 20 hours in a plane that is it not a trip! You can have real culture shock within the same country, discover new things such as dishes for example. The goal is to enjoy it, it is as rewarding!

Hello books lovers! And hello to all of you who, like me, wish they could travel, but can't because of the pandemic. Such a stick in the mud. So, to remediate that, I'm planning on taking a trip from my bedroom (or my living room, if I'm feeling adventurous). I am going to follow the footsteps of really inspiring solo female travellers, and explore Africa, Australia or Russia, wherever they take me. Here are five books, either memoirs from badass travellers or travel guides for women, for all of you stuck-at-home travellers, cautious adventurers, and thrill seekers!

• Wild, by Chery Strayed

A classic. Wild is Cheryl Strayed's memoir of her 1,100-mile hike on the Pacific Crest Trail in 1995 . At 22, Strayed was devastated by the death of her mother, while the rest of her family and her marriage fell apart. With nothing more to lose, no experience or training, driven only by blind will, she set off to hike 1,100 miles in the wilderness, from the Mojave Desert to a place on the Oregon-Washington border called Bridge of the Gods — and she did it it alone. This book is as much a recount of her adventure as it is a journey of self-discovery. It held the No. 1 spot on the Times’ best-seller list for seven weeks, was translated into 32 languages, and sold some 1.75 million copies.

• Somebody’s Heart is Burning: a woman wanderer in Africa, by Tanya Shaffer

Somebody's heart is burning is a collection of short stories, by Tanya Shaffer, an American woman who spent a year in Africa, fleeing a relationship. She began her journey as a work-camp volunteer in Ghana, and then visited Mali and East Africa. Eager have a genuine experience of the place rather than a tourist's perception, Shaffer worked as a volunteer, building schools and hospitals in remote villages in Ghana, Mali and East Africa. She shows the collision of African and North American cultures throughout her stories.

• Elsewhere: One Woman, One Rucksack, One Lifetime of Travel, by Rosita Boland

Rosita Boland spent the last three decades seeking new experiences and adventure on every part of the globe. In this serie of essays, she documents nine journeys from nine different moments in time. From a bus journey in Pakistan to Antarctica, through Australia,Thailand, Peru, Iceland, Bali, Japan or England, her book reveals how exploring the world, and those we meet along the way, can shape the course of a person’s life.

• Tracks: A Woman's Solo Trek Across 1700 Miles of Australian Outback, by Robyn Davidson

Robyn Davidson recounts her 1977 epic journey across seventeen thousand miles of Australian desert and bush. She was 26, and accompanied by four camels and her dog Diggity, when she threw herself in this adventure. Her story was first published in the National Geographic, which had funded her journey and had photographer Rick Smolan document her journey, and then in her memoir. Her incredible adventure was adapted into a movie in 2013.

• A Woman Alone: Travel Tales from Around the Globe, by Faith Conlon

This book is a collection of travel stories from 29 different women. Marybeth discovers the dubious pleasures of desert camel-riding when she decides to follow an ancient Indian trading route. Faith, a black Buddhist nun, enters a deserted train station at 3:00 a.m. in a Thai village controlled by armed bandits. Ena negotiates with Russian police to visit the blue-domed city of Samarkand. In A Woman Alone, these women and others tell their funny, thrilling, occasionally terrifying, ultimately transformative stories of solo female travellers.

We had the honour to interview Emilie, the (wonder) woman behind the blog Globe-trottine, to get her insights on solo female travelling. Emilie is a French woman from Poitiers, who has lived in Paris, London and Manila.  

Can you tell me a bit about yourself, when did you start travelling alone? Why? What is your current situation?

I started to travel alone about a decade ago: I was then living and working in Manila, in the Philippines (I lived there for four months). My stay arriving to an end without having had any real time to visit, and since none of my friends or acquaintances were available, I decided in a last-minute decision to go visit an island on my own, even if I was scared to go alone. Like in a movie, I packed my backpack that very morning and took the first plane. And it went really well! I realised I could very well travel alone, even just for a weekend. Today, I only travel in my free time for my pleasure, not for work.

Among the countries you have visited, which one is your favourite?

I fell in love with the Philippines, for the breath-taking landscapes but especially for the people. The Filipinos are extraordinarily kind people. Their warmth towards strangers and foreigners is just incredible. Even among the poor population, who live in slums, people are still welcoming and smiling. My second crush are the British Isles. It is not as far away, not as exotic, but it is a country that touches me since my teenagerhood, where I have always felt good, during every of my trip. I go there at least once a year. One does not think of taking vacations in Great Britain, because it rains, and because London really is the main city, but the entire country deserves to be visited, there are some magnificent places! I really hope Brexit won’t stop me from going there!

Which country or travel experience really surprised you?

Lapland: I went to the north of Finland, where I was for three days, and was expecting large areas of pristine snow but not at all the feeling of freedom I felt. I felt free like I had never felt before, I wanted to run and scream in the middle of nowhere -which would not have bothered anyone, I was only surrounded by snow! This feeling of being in the middle of nowhere, on the other side of the world, and of feeling like in a cocoon, was incredible.

What does travelling alone bring you?

I travel either alone or with my girlfriends. Actually, I recently realised that when I travel with a guy, I put up barriers all on my own. Whenever I travel with a guy (either a friend or boyfriend), I have this tendency to let myself be guided, to let him drive, to let him take the lead and decide where we will stop and thus a tendency to minimize what I want. This is completely stupid! In consequence, because I feel less free, when I come home I feel like I missed out on things, like I didn’t do everything I wanted because I didn’t dare say what I wanted to do or did not enjoy it as much as I could have. This is really a shame that still today we have this conception that, with a guy, it is him who decides, him who is in charge, and him who will take care of potential issues!

Whereas with a girlfriend, I feel a lot more on equal terms. I have less scruples or hesitations to compromise on things or do things each on our own. This sort of conditioning is really weird, especially that in my day to day life I am not shy or holding back with guys! Maybe today’s current 20-year-old women feel this a lot less, or are more aware of it with the actual feminists’ movements?

Has travelling changed your perception of yourself? How?

Yes, completely! I am someone rather scared, I love to stay at home. Often in my circle, whenever I say that I am going abroad alone, people are disturbed, they ask me how I do it, or if I don’t feel lonely. First of all, I am not daring or reckless. I am no more likely to get hit by a car in the streets in Sweden or Canada than I am in Poitiers or Paris! And I travel in western countries, I don’t take any particular risks, it is not like I am trekking in some extreme mountains or like I am exploring the Amazonia jungle!

Second, I don’t get bored or lonely, one meets a lot of people when travelling! Actually, I don’t behave the same way when I travel than in my normal daily life. I am a lot more open, and I trust people a lot more.

You want to meet people so bad when you are abroad, that might be why you are likely to be less wary, you want to know people. This is maybe naive, but these are things you can feel, I don’t trust everyone either obviously. In comparison, back at home I would not take the time to discuss with everyone I cross path with, if someone calls me out, I will just wonder what they want with me and be suspicious. So you actually meet more people when you are abroad!

Do you have an experience or person you met who changed your way of perceiving yourself, or the others, or even the fact of travelling alone?

It is done through a lot of encounters and small experiences. To me, it is always a little challenge to go alone, but less now because I am more used to it and I have built my shell. When I travel alone, I always feel more apprehensive than when I am accompanied, because I wonder if I will meet people, if they will be nice etc. And yes, every time, people see you, they smile, they come talk to you, and when you are having an issue, as it happened to me in Scotland, they come help you. In Scotland, I don’t think I ever walked alone on the side of the road more than 10mn without having someone pulling over and offering me a ride, even if it was not their initial route! It is all of that that makes one think that one can trust people, that if one has a problem, there will always be someone to come and offer a hand.

What would you say to people who say that traveling alone as a woman is dangerous?

That there is no more risk of something happening to us in the streets of Krakow than in the streets of Paris or Glasgow. Obviously, you need common sense, you cannot adventure yourself in places you wouldn’t in your daily life at home. You must trust your instincts: does this feel safe and ok or not? And if you have the slightest doubt, avoid it altogether. One can have troubles, whatever the country, whether one is alone or not, but I think there will always be someone to help. One must be careful of the country one plans to go, look out for signs: there are some countries where travelling alone as a woman is not advised, or not as much as in other countries. One must plan, prepare, one cannot go somewhere without having the slightest idea of what to expect!

How could we change this idea that women shouldn't travel alone, and should go with someone?

I think it is the women especially that we must convince, and not necessarily the men. As I was saying earlier, when I travel with a guy, I tend to put up barriers myself, so I think it is especially something in our own mindset that we need to change. We must not allow ourselves to be polluted by outside opinions, otherwise we end up not allowing ourselves to do certain things, or we limit ourselves. We make the choice to listen to those around us and stay in our little shell and tell ourselves that we cannot do it, or we see the other women around us who have done it and we realize that we are perfectly capable of doing it. Even the ones who are scared or who don’t feel capable of it!

Also, there is no need to leave for the other side of the world to show ourselves we are capable of travelling alone, even taking three days in another city or a neighbour country is enough to see that YES, we can travel alone, we are capable of handling it and actually handling it very well! It is a groundwork, a work of mindset, made by women for themselves and for others.

What is your worst experience? How did you handle it? Did it have an impact on you, your behaviour or your life?

I went for a weekend in the mountains in Philippines, during the monsoon season, and the torrential rains had created landslides. I found myself stuck in a hamlet in the middle of nowhere, the road literally cut and buried under rocks, and I needed to get a bus in the valley to go home and work the next day! But, as it turned out there was always a local coming to my help! We could not communicate together, I not speaking their language and them mine. Still, some locals welcomed me to their house, and went searching for the neighbour who owned a motorcycle, who took me further away until we got stuck by another landslide. Someone else came with a truck and dropped me further away etc…Every time, someone came to my rescue and helped me get closer to the bus stop, which I took in time! So we can get lost, we can have troubles, but there is always someone to help. It really gives faith in humanity. And then, the whole incident didn’t traumatize me, nothing serious happened, and it didn’t change my opinion on travelling alone as getting my bag stolen would have.

What advice and tips would you give women who hesitate to travel alone?

Being a big coward, it reassures me to organise and plan things ahead, but obviously I leave space for the unexpected. I lay the groundwork: I know where my plane lands, where my accommodation is located, which bus to take to get there, and, overall, I try to familiarize myself with the city’s map and to have landmarks. Of course, there are always some failures, you discover a big slope where you were not expecting it! But it buys me time and allows me to feel more at ease when I arrive. I know where I am getting, and I avoid potential issues. Also, I think that to project oneself and to plan helps take the decision to leave.

Your best experience while travelling?

There are so many, that is why one travels and keeps doing it, why one wants to travel! One in particular: last year I went to the Orkney Islands (north of Scotland), and to get there you take the ferry. I met and befriended a woman during the crossing, who spontaneously suggested that she and her husband drop me off directly at my hotel rather than letting me take the shuttle once we would arrive. Afterwards, we kept in touch and I met her and her husband throughout my week there, at the pub or my place. And when my stay came to an end, they both insisted to drop me off at the ferry, even if they had a party planned that same evening! We kept in touch, we send each other gifts at Christmas, and they were supposed to come and visit me this year. It is not always the most obvious or spectacular things that make a trip, but also encounters like these! Not even a day there and I had already made friends!

Do you have a message to women who will read you?

Dare to do it, I am the perfect example! Even being scared, every woman can travel alone! You don’t need to leave for the other side of the globe to prove yourself you can do it. Even if it is not far away and for a short amount of time, go wherever you want, for as long as you want! You will find a freedom that you will never find when travelling with other people. To travel alone is to feel that incredible freedom and to feel exhilarated, when you realise you can do it!

If you are over 20 years old, If you go into college, If you work for company or if you retire,   You face the moment like this : “Oh, please let me alone! Don’t bother me anymore. I’m so sick of everything around! I have no idea what I can do!”  This is so natural feeling which everyone goes through at least once in a lifetime. The point is, When This thought comes in our mind, We easily become fragile and we fall into a deep hole which looks endless and no exit.  

Then, You are panic. You have no idea what you can do. Here is the easiest way you can get out of the situation : Go out and start your own trip. If I say this, maybe you could ask me, what for? why I have to do that? If you give me a minute, Let me show you what you earn from your solo trip.

The first You earn: 100% understanding about there is so many various ways to live our life

 Please look around for a moment. You can see your family, friends and colleagues. Again, Look at them closely. Do you notice? Yes, They are living their life just same as you do. Because you choose them to hang out with. In the life you live, People think as you do, People works as you work. Instinctively, we gather people who is similar to us. Because It makes us feel comfortable. But people grow through experience when they meet new people and circumstance. And that is possible when you go for your solo trip. When you start to travel, You realize many people in the world actually live those lives which you think it is only possible just on TV or a book. The fact is you are the one who is just not included in these lives. You have desire to explore new life style and apply it in your life and want to make it better. Then, Solo trip is the best chance to try it.

The Second thing You earn: You don’t step back anymore when you meet stranger. Because You’re the one to come first!

 When you start solo trip, You totally understand situation which there is no one to rely on. It doesn’t take a long time to figure out the fact that what would happen during the trip totally depends on you. If you don’t know how to take a bus or how to book a restaurant, You are the one who are in trouble. So, This makes you jump into your life which you just let go before. So Eventually, You find the truth – You can create your own life with your hand if you have a will. Solo trip gives you a chance to do experiment what will happen when you hold your horse about your life. You are not a bystander of your life anymore.

The third thing You earn: People who listen their inner voice through trip doesn’t feel lonely

 Going to solo trip means that you are ready to be independent. For a long time, We are belong to family, school, company. So, At first, when you are apart from them, You feel alone. Maybe you want to go back to your cozy home. But Let’s think about it. Sometimes there is a moment that you thought no one can’t understand you and this makes you disappointed. But You have to face the truth. They are not you. So It is so natural they can’t fully understand you. For me, It took long time to realise that I need to face the truth. You would admit this : You are the only one who can understand yourself. So You have to be the one who know much about you. People who know about themselves well don’t feel lonely. Because they spend enough time to think who they are through solo trip.

This is just at least things you get through solo trip. That means more opportunity is waiting for you.   Do you need more story to convince you? Please visit NomadHer site & app. All NomadHers in the world is waiting to be your trip mate!

The minute I land at a new place, I always feel that thrill crawling up my spine, the anticipation and excitement of travelling bubbling up my chest. Stepping outside, one of the first things I always notice is the people, what they look like, how they are dressed, the way they talk, and many more unique characteristics visible in just a glance. It’s just amazing how the differences between my culture and this strange one appear so starkly. I always become infatuated with the language, food, clothing, and most of all, the queer little habits only noticeable through interaction. I have visited countries where the left hand is considered impolite, where shaking your head means yes, and chicken feet are considered a delicacy.

In Japan, for example, I was dining with locals when a young man sitting next to me burped loudly. I laughed, thinking it was a joke, but everyone stared at me, and one of them was kind enough to explain that burping shows appreciation for the chef’s cooking. I still shake my head and laugh at this experience until today, always in awe of how strange we find small foreign habits.

After a while, however, all of this strangeness gets old, and this is when culture shock comes in. I become frustrated with the language barrier, as I can’t even get orders right. I miss my comfort foods, having enough of eating strange things over and over again. I never get the transportation system right, I walk on the wrong side of the road, I keep getting stared at, and I always feel uncomfortable. Basically, I’m tired of always feeling left out and not understanding what is happening around me. Culture shock comes at random times, and I start to have thoughts about coming home. Then I always remind myself why I travel in the first place. The culture is why traveling is priceless, the experience of newness, stepping into a world I have never seen before. I have the privilege of meeting people behaving in a completely different way from my neighbors back home, even though really, we do not live so far apart. At this stage, I need to adopt a childlike mindset, one that never gets tired of exploring. I take pride in becoming the stranger, and I try to see positive things in the local habits. I might even adopt a few quirks that actually fit my lifestyle.

Slowly but steadily, I adapt, I socialize, and I learn, relentlessly. I favor my right hand, I try burping, I shake my head, and I eat chicken feet at the local diner! That’s the thing about culture shock, it allows me to see myself from a different perspective, and I learn more about myself in a few days than I would in a year back home. I can become a child again, in an entirely different place!

The next thing I know, I am actually enjoying myself. I survived, and I love it. I have been through this over and over again, and I cannot wait for the next time I can travel to a new place and experience culture shock yet again.

I love planning my vacations and I did plan them to fit my monthly visit from mother nature. It’s no joke but my period ALWAYS decides to show itself while I am on vacation. EVERY-FREAKING-TIME. When I was 14, I went skiing for the first time (no, this isn’t about skiing and I can’t ski at all, even now!). I wore a pristine white outfit to match the surroundings. It was indeed beautiful. But, later on, I started feeling a bit achy and wondered, what is happening? Until somebody hushed in my ears that there was something on my pants. Needless to say, not a lot of skiing happened and my time was spent sitting in a corner and crying out of Fomo. But, around 8 years later, I have learned to live and travel with them with no discomfort. Here, I will share with you the ultimate guide of traveling with the crimson wave!

Does travelling affect your period?

It is quite common for us ladies not to have our period or experience delays while travelling. Normally, this tends to send us in a state of panic but fear not! Ultimate control of our period cycle resides with the hormones secreted by hypothalamus and pituitary glands. Well, to explain it simply, any change in our emotional or physical health which includes lack of sleep, change in diet or stress can affect our hormonal balance which leads to irregular period. The two most important hormones which control and determine our cycle are: cortisol and melatonin and they are directly related to travel and stress. When the level of these hormones changes, it affects the period, making it come earlier or later than expected. Things like early flights, jetlag, different time zones, and the added stress affect these hormones.

What do I do if I don’t get my period on a vacation?

There is no need to panic! This is very common. But, if your period is delayed by a few weeks and there is a chance that you could be pregnant, it is wise to take a pregnancy test. Pregnancy tests are readily available all over the world. But, if your period is delayed and there is no chance of you being pregnant, there is nothing to worry about, it is just due to hormonal changes experienced while travelling. It is advisable to check with your doctor after you skip 2 of your cycles.

What are some tips for travelling with the period?

1. Track your period
   This is not just a tip for travelling but for life in general. Nowadays, I use the app “Flo” to track my period. It has the data of my period for over 3+ years and it uses that to accurately predict my next period. There is usually a margin of +/- 1 day in my case. This has really changed the way I travel. Before, there was always a surprise to see the crime scene in my pants. Now, if I am crying for no reason and feeling irritated and snappy, I can just check the app and realise that no wonder I was feeling like that. I can also stock up on my guilty pleasure foods – chips, cookies, and chocolate before. In addition to predicting your period cycle, it even gives you health insights and forums to discuss anonymously with others.
   Apps recommended – Flo, Period Calendar, Clue
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2. Birth Control methods
   There are several hormonal and non-hormonal birth control methods that can be used to either better plan and predict your period or even avoid them altogether. Avoiding your period is usually not recommended but in some cases like when you have to do something physically straining like hiking, walking, snorkeling, etc and if you have a lot of period-related cramps and pain, it is advisable to skip it for a month altogether. I have tried it myself when I went on a vacation with a beach and swimming and I had no problems. In fact, an added advantage of being on birth control pills is virtually painless period and that is very valuable for a girl like me with PCOS.
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3. Workout and Eat Well
   The first thing which I hear at every Gynaecologist visit is – do light exercise on your period. Just a little bit of yoga or stretching can relieve cramps and period pain. Eating a diet that replenishes your body like leafy green vegetables, beans, and lentils and nuts, which are rich in iron is generally considered good. Drink plenty of water and snack on fruits. But please avoid coffee and alcohol. It is commonly regarded that coffee tends to make cramps worse, make you dehydrated, and also give digestive issues. Alcohol gives hangover, which comes with a huge list of problems.
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4. Learn about different cultures and their attitude towards the period.
   In some cultures, menstruation is a taboo topic. Many religious or cultural practices forbid menstruating women from practicing in religious ceremonies. In South Asia and Southeast Asia, it is common for menstruating women to not be allowed inside a temple or kitchen.
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5. Find out beforehand where to find menstrual products
   Globally, access to menstrual products varies substantially. Developed countries tend to have a wider selection of products such as tampons, pads, period panties, cups, and what not! But in some areas in Africa and Asia, access to them, especially disposable products, is limited. Tampons, which are used the most in the West, are not available in many countries. If you do find tampons, there is a big chance that they will come without an applicator. In many countries, you will not find period products in supermarkets but in pharmacies. It is also very uncommon for women to work in pharmacies and most men working there do not understand menstruation. Informing yourself beforehand will make your life easier.
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6. Planning activities around your period
   Prepare your itinerary in such a way that you can do something relaxing and less intense and taxing on those days. Maybe go shopping? Or indulge and try different foods. Watch a show, a local show, or check out local channels! The choices and experiences are endless.

Here, you will find a period packing checklist which will make your life simpler!

1. Your menstruation product of choice and especially if it is hard to find overseas.
2. Comfortable clothing because I use my period as an excuse to dress like a Hobo.
3. A heating pad.
4. Pain relief medications that work for you.
5. If you take birth control pills or specific medication, your prescription.
6. Tons of underwear, just in case.
7. Wet wipes and tissues.
8. Disposable bags.
9. FAVORITE SNACKS OR TEAS OR WHATEVER! I always have chamomile tea with me because I have found that it relaxes me.

What are some sustainable ways to make my life easier while travelling on the period?

The first menstrual product which we are usually handed when we are first visited by aunt Flo is a pad. Later, we graduated to tampons. We go through at least thousands of those in our lives. They are all great but did you know that they are mostly just plastic? Pads, tampons, liners, packaging, etc. are single-use products and generate 200,000 tonnes of waste in a year! We really need to address the way we deal with our periods.

Let’s talk about reusable menstrual products and especially menstrual cups and period panties. I switched to a menstrual cup 3 years back from tampons and I haven’t look back ever since. I have had the best experience with it and the environmental impact is just an added advantage. Now, I travel with it everywhere and never face the situation of potentially running out during my period.

A menstrual cup is a cup (duh!) which is usually made of rubber or silicone which, when inserted into your vagina, catches all the period fluid. Period panties are underwear designed to wear alone, without tampons and then washed. These are the most widely used products. There are several pros and cons to these.

PROS:

• Less waste.

• Lower cost.

• Lasts for a long time during the day than pads and tampons.

• No leakage.

CONS:

• Can be messy.

• Can be a bit uncomfortable for a few.

• Difficult to clean in some situations.

This is what I recommend:  Do not use a reusable product on your vacation for the first time. Try it before and let your body adjust and figure out how it works. Find what works for you because each cup will not work for you. The cup which suits you depends on your age, your flow, and whatnot. Initially, when I tried the menstrual cup, it was a mess. I did not insert it properly and needless to say, there was a mess that scared me from trying it again. However, with a little practice and YouTube videos, I learned. I am a firm supporter of it!

How to fly comfortably on your period!

It can be quite tricky and uncomfortable to travel long distances while on your period. One of the most eventful flights of my life happens to also be the longest one I ever took. It was from New York City to Mumbai. It was 15 hours! I not only had my wisdom teeth decide to prove its existence and give me the worst pain of my life, but I also got my period. I learned to be prepared for it on a long flight. Here are some tips:

• Get in an aisle seat so that you don’t end up bothering people around you every time you need to use the bathroom.

• Drink loads of water.

• Pack your period kit in your carry-on luggage and if possible, keep it in your bag which you can keep with you instead of stowing it up.

• Wear comfortable clothing.

• Remember to change your tampon every 4-5 hours.

• Do not drink alcohol.

• Try and get tons of sleep!

This is something only we experience and our period should never ever stop us from travelling. After all, there is nothing more empowering than traveling on periods and it is always a great reminder for how strong and badass we women are!

When is the last time you had a genuine big smile in front of people instead of covering the bottom of your heart? Can you remember the day which thrills you when you just think of it and can’t stop waiting? Are you still frustrated that you are only a small being in front of the giant wall which lets you down?  

Many people are too tired to think about this.

Without noticing, we gradually get used to taking orders from someone and just do them as scheduled. There is so much burden piled up to us. Finally, we forget the fact that we are not this kind of person originally.  

You are someone who has lots of creative ideas, who loves to speak your opinion, you are brave to face your weakness and you are full of energy to go forward to your dream. But for now, you feel like you can’t do any of it.

Do you know what you need at this stage of life? you need to go out and make time to meet the real me, definitely.  

It was at this time of day, the middle of April, when I started my first solo trip to Prague. It was so cold even though it was an obvious spring, I was freezing to death, and so was my heart. I still remember what I thought in the Prague airport, “I wanna go back again. I really miss my cosy bed at home”.

The next day, I went on a short trip to Dresden, Germany. When the train ran across the border of Germany, my phone stopped working, because it was an unexpected visit, so I had just bought a Usim card which can only be used in Prague. No internet, drizzling all day in a foreign country without an umbrella, the only thing I could do was just hanging around places not far from the platform, trying not to forget the way back to train station.

Gray, gloomy half a day passed, I stood on the platform to take a train back to my accommodation in Prague. I wasn’t talkative, rather close to be shy, but at this time, I desperately needed someone to talk to. I looked around and found a solo traveller. Fortunately, he took the same train as me so I just followed him.

But when I tried to pull the door handle, it didn’t work. It was an embarrassing moment, struggling with handle. He stood up from his seat and he just pushed aside the door. Yes, not pulled, just pushed it. My original plan was to go in with a generous smile and talk to him. But that handle ruined everything and just left awkward moment.

There was the only strained atmosphere. Finally, he took his earphone from his pocket. As soon as I saw it, I realized that it would be over if he listened to his music and then the only thing left behind would be a three-hours silent time back to Prague. At that moment, the Announcement was released from the captain.

Instinctively, I noticed It was my last chance to change my day. ‍

So I said, “Did you understand what the train captain said?” he put down his earphone and started to explain like he wanted to talk to me too. As you can guess, I didn’t care what the announcement was about at all. From that time, we continued to chatter until we arrived at home,

It was an amazing experience to be able to share my thoughts and find in common with the person who I didn’t even know the name a few minutes ago but who had now become my friend. I wasn’t in a blue mood anymore. I was full of confidence with the fact I had just made it: “oh my god. I did it! I talk to a new person and have a great talk-time on the train which I dreamed of for a long time! Could I have imagined this would happen a few hours ago?”

I realized the key to change my situation is just in my hand. I’m powerful enough to improve a situation more than I think.  It is like breaking old me. If I hadn’t found the courage to talk first, If I hadn’t gone to travel by myself, I would have stayed the same, a coward giving up before taking action. If you have many “ If ” in your life, please just throw them in the trash can because it doesn’t help. Having time to think is only valuable when you are already on the way to carry out, thinking is nothing with itself.  

You are a brave and talented person, more than you think. All your strength is just hidden deep inside of you. And it’s waiting for you to find it. The best way to find it is to travel alone. You will be surprised by what you discover - how many things you can handle and how good your are at many things. A person whose inside is strong doesn’t tremble when meeting the huge wind. Being unbeatable is done by listening to my inner voice from my heart.

I hope you don’t miss the opportunity to face the real you. It is a huge privilege to go pursue your dreams.  We all know quarantine will end one day. Because we are being to see hope even in the desert watching stars in the sky. We keep doing our things with endless efforts to be stronger. I hope the day comes soon we will meet on the way to travel. Because we are NomadHer.

How did I start my first solo traveling?  

In 2010 I didn’t know what to do with my life and the crisis in Spain was not helping at all. I decided, with a hunch that I still can't explain, that I had to learn English and live an adventure.  So I bought a ticket to a new place, Bournemouth, a small city on the coast of England. I still remember the tears at the airport, don't you ever think everything is wonderful?

In the beginning, my stay was going to be for three months, but the adventure ended up becoming in five years. Five years!  After three months in Bournemouth, bored, I moved to London (the jungle, as I call it), where I worked very hard, but had the opportunity to visit all around England. I had to!  Whenever I could and my budget allowed, I traveled to a new place; Bath, Oxford, Cardiff. And suddenly, I realize that I liked that version of myself, traveling and enjoying myself without depending on anyone.  

Five years passed with its ups and downs, and I realized I missed Spain; my friends, my family, the warmth of the people, the sun, and, of course, the tapas.  

But the woman who left, in 2010 stayed at the same airport of Madrid, returned  as a woman with more self-esteem, knowing herself more, recognizing herself brave and  as a warrior.

Definitely, valuing me as a woman.

And with the return, the crisis of the 30s arrived. And how did I deal with it?

Traveling!

I wanted to volunteer in Africa. And I did it.  I wanted to travel to Costa Rica. And I traveled.  And I couldn’t stop!  Not just traveling but I tried new experiences. I have jumped from the highs, I have overcome an obstacle race, one of those that ends up full of mud (me! Hello?), I have jumped by zip lines to more than 800 meters high...  

And still counting!  With all these experiences have helped me to trust myself and even more,

I wanted to encourage other women to take a trip that would mark them for life, so that they could see that if I have traveled alone without needing anything or anyone, they can too (you, who read to me, you can too).  

We, women, are more powerful than we think we are.  

I hope this inspires you to take action and to travel to that place you always wanted to. With yourself ;)